RinkQuotes: Talking in quotes

Chris has entered.
Morris: Hey, Chris.
Chris: Ullo folks!
Chris: We can't sit here doing nothing all day... People might think we're workmen!
* Chris sings "Falling in love with love is falling for make-believe..."
* Chris sings "Falling in love with Jim is falling for Arnold Spriggs..."
* Chris feels like a fool.
Morris: I'm making a comic.
Chris: Of me?
Chris: Won't need much work...
Morris: No.
Morris: Of Hamlet.
Morris: http://eric.sorayume.net/hamlet/
Chris: Anybody know http://homepage.mac.com/waynestewart/goons.html
Chris: ?
Zarniwoop: Would that be the Goon Show?
gremlinn has left.
Chris: (Eccles) Ooh, yeah.
Zarniwoop: Hm. A Goons MP3 archive.
Chris: You see! He knew the answer!
* Chris challenges himself to speak only in Goon Show quotes.
Zarniwoop: That shouldn't be too difficult.
Chris: What what whatwhatwhatwhat?
Morris: I challenge you to speak only in lines from Shakespeare.
Zarniwoop: "You'll never get through! The banana tree is guarded by Major Dennis Bloodnok!" "Bloodnok,
eh? Harris!" "Yes?" "Bring money!"
Chris: Never! Never do you hear me, never!
Morris: http://www.rhymezone.com/shakespeare/ should be good if you need some help.
Chris: I can see it all now...
Chris: I'll fight till my ammunition's gone...
Morris: Thou art a villain.
Chris: Oohh..
Chris: Stop adlibbing!~
Chris: Stop adlibbing!
Morris: A plague o' both your houses.
Chris: I can't swim in a waterbottle!
Morris: Well, sit we down, and let us hear Bernardo speak of this.
Chris: Who's he?
Zarniwoop: All the crimes you are about to hear have been specially committed for this programme.
Chris: Stop reading that Radio Times!
Morris: Nay, answer me. Stand and unfold yourself!
Chris: Hey! I keep falling down!
Morris: Thou art a scholar.
Chris: You be careful what you calls me...
Zarniwoop: Pull up a chair.
Chris: I'd rather stand.
Morris: Sit we down.
* Chris stands on his chair
Zarniwoop: Now then. Name?
Chris: Gladys Seagoon.
Morris: Bernardo.
Zarniwoop: G L A D Y S...sorry?
Chris: What a splendid memory you have sir.
Morris: A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.
Chris: Neddie Flatool Seagoon.
Zarniwoop: Ah.
Zarniwoop: Address?
Morris: In the state of Denmark.
Zarniwoop: Postcode?

At this point, Chris's browser crashed, hence the crashing sounds.

Chris: Downing Street, SW9.
* Chris hears/causes great crashing sounds.
Chris: OK, that's enough!
Zarniwoop: Downing Street...South...S o u t h...W e s t...N i n...Oh, it's no good. I'll have to get a pencil and
paper and write this all down.
Chris: If we're all here for ninety-four years, we might as well make ourselves com-fort-a-ble.
Zarniwoop: Minnie! Min-min-minnie!
Chris: Oh here. Here here here.
Stephen has left.
Chris: Henery?
Zarniwoop: This gentleman is going to South America.
Chris: Goodbye!
Chris: I seek Fred Nurk.
Morris: O, farewell, honest soldier. Who hath relieved you?
Zarniwoop: Fred Nurk? That's Fred Nurk's name!
Morris: You did a good jeaaororaoroiroriaoriab out there today.
Chris: Shut up when you talk to me!
Morris: Speak, I charge thee, speak!
Chris: Shut up when you say shut up to me!
Morris: By heaven, I charge thee, speak!
Chris: Here we are, starving to death, and all you can think of is food!
Morris: Food and diet, to some enterprise that hath a stomach in't.
Chris: Bang bang! Bang bang bangee! Bang! Click! Click? I must have run out of bullets!
Morris: Shoot forth thunder!
Chris: Get up, man, get up! Stop sulking about that silly little hole in your head!
Mia has left.
Zarniwoop: Great knobbly plates of toes! Me boots have exploded!
Chris: Your old Etonian socks have got holes in them!
Chris: With Footo! The wonder boot exploder!
Morris: Fello, thy words are madness.
Zarniwoop: How's yer old dad?
Chris: He hasn't written since he died.
Morris: My father!Methinks I see my father.
Chris: I got a pussycat.
Morris: The cat will mew.
Chris: That fooled you, didn't it!
Morris: Alas, sweet aunt, i know not what you mean.
Chris: He says he can't understand it either!
Zarniwoop: What?
Chris: Yes yes yesyesyesyesyes!
Zarniwoop: Pull up a chair.
Chris: I'd rather stand.
* Chris sings "Sideways, through the sewers of the Strand with you..."
Zarniwoop: I'm walking backwards for Chriiiiiiiiiiiiistmasssssss...
* Chris pauses for audience applause
Chris: Not a sausage!
Chris: I must speak to the writer about getting a sosinge...
Morris: No, not so much as a ducat.
Chris: What happened to that penny? I sold it for two halfpennies!
Morris: I stole these babes.
Chris: Stop this madness!
Zarniwoop: I am Adolpha Spriggs, a non-playing musician! Allow me to do all the orchestral links.
Morris: I pray thee, Jack, be quiet.
Chris: "I'm oooonly a stroooling vagabond..."
* Zarniwoop shoots by Chris.

Chris wanted Zarniwoop to shoot him, but had to do the job himself. Didn't quite work unfortunately.

Chris: Thud
Morris: Their king is dead!
Chris: (picks up phone) Lloyds?
Morris: The bloody dog is dead!
Chris: About that life insurance...
* Chris changes to Gilbert and Sullivan quotes, and begs Zarniwoop and Morris to continue with
Goon Show and Shakespeare as before.
Morris: Beg not your death of us.
Chris: As someday it may happen that a victim must be found...
Chris: Nonsense - yes perhaps. But oh such precious nonsense!
Chris: The criminal cried as he dropped him down in a state of wild alarm...
* Chris bares his big right arm
Morris: By a sleep to say we end the heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to. To sleep,
perchance to dream . . . what dreams may come?
Morris: Well, good night.
Chris: But the darkness has passed and it's daylight at last and the night has been long - ditto ditto my song - and
thank goodness they're both of them over!
Morris has left.
Chris: A pleasant occupation for a highly susceptible Chancellor!
Zarniwoop: *yawn*
* Chris looks to Zarniwoop, and sings:
Chris: For he is an Englishman! For he himself has said it, and it's greatly to his credit, that he is an Englishman,
that he iiiis an Eeeenglishman!
Chris: Farewell my own...
Chris has left.